Dear Friends and buddies,
My first episode yesterday re Love, Life and lineage (LLL): letter of advise to families, was philosophically based and theologically referred. It was the moral situations of families that pushed me to continue this writing to give them e-guidance and references. In my side, I offer this to Him as my way of contributing in the evangelization of Truth and as a teacher, keep my vocation to help people help themselves as well.
I would like to invite you all to join me in going to the real family relationships, the society they lived, and the world in reality and discuss the cause and effect of the problems in the real world..
Many families are experiencing chaotic situations due to to economic struggles, and poor communication between and among them. More than that, the society they lived in now is gearing towards materialism, egoism and daily whispered by news on graft-and-corruption and other immoralities and several cover-ups in the government. It makes their daily start heavy then.
Today, families are struggling in dealing with their responsibilities as conjugal partners, as parents to their growing children, dealings with their neighbors and settling their bills.
The usual scenario of the father is he is kept to serve a company or employer for a living and his time was mostly in there. He got very less time for his family. Mothers too are prone to be servant-like in the house doing care-giving works to the children, daily kitchen works, cleaning routine, doing laundry and policing the grown up children. She could not go to work for a living too like her husband as she became a fulltime parent-laborer in the house. Parenting becomes her 99% focus.
When I asked some couples on how frequent they communicate with each other, most of them have less chance to talk on family matters except on the bills, the kitchen supplies, the school fees and needs of the children. A family vision, dream or plan for the whole family is not tackled. There is no clear direction for the family on where to be, but just simply survive with the daily needs.
Eventually, most fathers applied for OFW contracts and work abroad to meet the needs of his family. Hence, the mother or vis-a-vis, is left to take care of the children. In this situation, the conjugal relationship of the couples is shelved. No night affairs for a year or two. Would that be healthy for both? Hmmmmm! Husband, as a married couple, is it okay for you to sleep alone without your partner with you at night? Is your mind at peace? How about you Mrs wife? Dont you remember emotional needs during the nights with your partner? The one or two year contracts of the OFW-spouses broke these conjugal relations. And to meet the human desires, some immoral problems occur. Later, family breakdown occur and statistics says, the family breakdown among OFW's is sky-rocketing. The spouse left at home met another partner if not the OFW has found someone with him. This is not a generalization but cases we found among them.
For couples staying their own country, there are still many limitations where immorality is high. Adultery, polygamy, incest, homosexuality and the like are just somewhere around the corner.
In like manner, children are sent to schools with the good support of the parents The OFW has an ace on this as they can sned good financial backing for their children. But OFW-children have no principal teacher in their first school, their home. Parent is the first teacher of their children. Parent is the first partner for his sports activity. Parent is his dual partner in his solo and duet singing. Parent is the first police to give discipline and supervise the children. Parent is the first priest of the children to let the children know and recognized the Almighty Parent of humankind. But the absence of the OFW-parent made all these educational courses a failure! Hence, children are illiterate in their first school of learning on what is love and life.
In like manner, normal children who are with their parents are not enrolled in their first home. Parents donot act as teacher. They only bring them to their second teacher in public or private schools. Parents donot usually offer family time with their children but have time on drinking spree or shopping desires. They leave it all to their yaya's or lola's and the children could not realize the importance of family values and culture.
How did all these things happen? Let us look first on the couples.
The supposed to be first father and mother of man named Adam and Eve, were to grow and develop first to their maturity. Their goal is to be perfect, be fruitful individuals. Their education while growing was necessary and a pre-requisite for their next course to make a family. Their First Teacher, God, gave them a direction (others called it a test. Was it really? not to eat the fruit on the tree of the knowledge of good and evil or else they will die. Human history in the first book, Genesis 2:27 said that man could eat anything in the garden except the forbidden fruit while they were studying the course of life in their Garden of Eden school. But the first lady disobeyed the direction of their Teacher. She was tempted to eat the fruit by another being and ate the forbidden fruit together. She passed it to her classmate, the growing man and they also ate it togehter for the second time. When their Teacher God learned about it, they were thrown away from the Garden of Eden school. They felt so ashamed of their mistakes and cover their private parts with fig leaves. Adam and Eve fall and left. Thus, the unplanned and false lineage came to exist.
No parent would ever test his children by putting an aromatic bread on the table and say not to eat a bread on the table because there is a poison in there and will cause their death. In like manner, God did not test Adam and Eve with a mere fruit.
They were pure and naked while they were in the Garden of Eden. But after they ate the fruit, they were so ashamed to face God and cover their private parts with fig leaves. It is our human nature to hide or conceal parts of our bodies that committed a mistake or has some dirt on it.We hide them from our parents, teachers, friends or supervisors. If you hold something forbidden, you hide your hands. If you are eating a food not yours and was caught, you cover your mouth. Right? Our conscience dictate that it was a mistake. So man hide it.
In like manner, the eating of the forbidden fruit which made Adam and Eve hide their sexual parts was an immoral untimely sexual act. God prohibited man not to engage to sexual contacts before they are blessed and multiply their family. Man has to keep his purity before their holy marriage and blessing. That was the reason why Adam and Eve were so ashamed when God learned about their pre-marital sexual activity. That was the origin of sin of man leading man to his "death" or separation from the source of life, Creator. Is a a forbidden fruit worth more than life? It is the purity and integrity of man which can equate life.
If we understood the root cause of the fall of man, we can easily understand why man is so dominated by selfishness or egoism; why man covet his neighbors; why man is so greedy and the like. It is not food or clothing or shelter but sex always become uncontrollable in man. It is the root cause why from the early age in their puberty, teenagers are prone to pornography, untimely marriage, teenage pregnancy, rape, molestation, homosexual activities, unwanted children, abortion and the like. Man inherited these odds from the origin of sin.
Issues even inside the church are getting heavier as seen in the media and reality. Have you heard of the recent Catholic nun in India who revealed after she left from her vow, the immoralities inside the convent involving lesbianism and priests? the priests' sexual abuses in America and even in the Philippines? the open gay archbishop making divisions in the protestant churches? These are current unresolved cases even in the religious communities. Sex is seen as uncontrollable by man who never understood the ideals of the three blessings and purpose of life.
Even in the Muslim faith, circumcision was a religious ritual to purify the sexual organ of man, sheding blood from his sex organ to pay the lost life called death when man committed the first sin. Filipinos practiced that since. But boys going to circumcision by now mostly during summer time no longer know the significance of "tuli" or circumcision but just bring his courage to be circumcized and soon proud to be considered as already a young adult.
That was the cause of these past and present immoralities. It just multiply to more selfishness going further to robbery, fightings, tribal wars, killings and gang rapes, adultery and other traumatic experiences and holocaust.
Man's connection to His Creator, the strengthening of man's faith is a basic thing to reverse this unplanned reality. You can trace how man tried to go back to God from Noah's family to Abrham's family to Moses and the Israelite tribes or nation. Even the Mosaic law clearly says not to covet thy neighbors or commit adultery. Thus, correcting the old sin.
Our real world today is so blind enough to understand all these. They even fight for same-sex marriage forgetting that even the unsolved global aids problem started or traced from homosexual relationship.
(This article is originally written by Dr. Cadano with a purpose. Permission to copy this is required. Comments are welcome for discussion purposes.)
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