Love, Life and Lineage: Leadership and Salvation Before and Current

After a big problem came to the life of man, man's lineage was shifted to the snake-evil domain called devil.

But the Origin of creations did not give up His Original Plan and man's purpose of life.

Man's failure was pronunced as death, meaning man's separation from God. Man's physical life and spiritual life were both shifted to Satan. Hence, salvation of man should also be both spiritual and physical in a sense.

Jesus coming was like parent's plan to bring his sick children to the doctor for restoration or the so called salvation. In a sense, God has been aiming to send the messiah or savior since Adam's era. But it takes 4000 biblical years from Adam to the time of Abraham to Moses to Jesus to make this salvation plan implemented. Why that long? Why too long for the doctor, the saviour to come and serve his mission to give salvation to man?

Noah built the ark long time before there was a flood. A time identity can be seen as the providence is not in a snap but have several conditions and pre-requisites to make a foundation. There is a time management in this sense.

Jesus physical life is meant to give a physical salvation, a true lineage of man centering on God. As he was not accepted by the Jewish people, his physical life was at risk. As he was crucified, his body could not give physical salvation nor be a start of a new lineage of man but his soul separated in his time of death. His spirit made a spiritual salvation to Christian followers.

Nevertheless, we still see many crimes and sinfullness in history and today. Why? These are proofs of the absence of complete salvation. Man has a portion of responsibility to fulfill as salvation is not a spoon-fed providence of salvation.

Looking at the Philippine scenario in today's era, Philippines is in a crucial time identity in the providence. JDV and GMA are in political war. Villar is facing many presidentiables for 2010. And this latest, Fr. Among Ed Panlilio, a Catholic priest on-leave or suspended to do his priestly duties and the concurrent governor of Pampanga is aiming to lead as convenor for 2010 presidential candidate if not he himself will run.

Why a priest? Among Ed is a typical example of a non-traditional politician in his way of leading Pampanga as the current governor there. He is opposed by the legislative and other oppositionists but he prevails. His first months of collections in the quarry projects served as good evidence of the failure and corruption of past leaders. Bro. Eddie Velarde's ambition too is also another mushroom from the religious figure to political figures.

The separation of church and state in the constitution is now seemingly a non-binding article. But if we look at this closely, there is an obvious reason why politics is challenged by church figures this time.

Church is more aligned to moral, ethical and spiritual gears. It is a strong sign that the political figures now are weak in these areas. This can be true as corruption and many other accusations are thrown to the current political and government leaders.

The 2010 national election will bring a new horizon of leadership to Philippines. Next to 2010 is the local election again on 2013. And it is the due date of Rev. and Father Sun Myung Moon in his providential time to have the Chun Il Guek or CIG be established. Philippines has so much things to prepare from 2010 for the national election and the 2013 local elction where government leaders are seen to have a big role in declaring the CIG of Rev. SMM.

Shall we give a look into this scenario?

Perhaps, the local and regional centers, the tribal leaders as well, can do something too if they align all their programs and projects to this par. Is it time to field local candidates and give a hand to government authority from our own breed by now?

Whatever is the vision of the local or regional center, I strongly suggest that this be given a look as UM Philippines is so crazy focusing to GPF rallies leaving no educational curriculum to the local leadership nor a clear program to every center to keep and maintain the momentum of their every rally. Budget is so big in every GPF move, yet, no local government has fully embraced CIG and the like.

The local centers and tribal leaders need to make a consensus as early as possible for the greater good of the providence in their areas.

Love, Life and Lineage: Four Kinds of love

In high school life, the word love is so sensitive. It usually is being misinterpreted as sex. Thus, love and sex are words crushed to the desires of adolescents.

There could be false love and/or true love. False love was the sexual mistake of the first and man and woman who fell. But that is not our main point this time.

There are cases, where mothers who got unwanted pregnancies are not that loving. These single mothers were unprepared and her pregnancy was unplanned, result of pre-marital acts, maybe from rapes, sexual adventures and the like. Hence, these single mothers not mature enough to value or care for her unplanned born baby. In Japan, baby hatch is a drop box in a hospital window, wehre mother can leave her new born baby if she decides to give up her own baby to others who like to adopt the baby. It may be a hospital system or program in that prefecture. But is also show how the Japanese mother value her own child, how she value life, how shallow or premature is her love to give life to her baby. These are facts and domino effects and results of the fall of man.

Of course, parents are both the father and the mother of the child. But obviously, the mother gives more to the baby since conception to the life-risk delivering of the birth of the baby, to lactating responsibility and all other maternal process. Father, aside from the sperm he offered to his wife, has other responsibilities of course but not that close or direct to the baby. He has a different role and responsibility in parenting care.

Ideally, when a baby is born, the immediate kind of love he experienced is the parental love. The mother who embraced him after he was being born, allowing him to suck his mother’s breast for milk even without seeing her yet as the baby still could not see at that stage. It is his instinct and feeling that he has a mother who cares and loves him.

Moreover, father and mother are partners in nursing the baby. If the father works to find a living, his salary maybe so limited that he finds way to tighten his blet from personal expenses so long as he can bring home something for his child/children. During the early days of the infant, the father too used to do the laundry for his baby and his wife as well, cooked the food for the family and clean the house and so on.

When the children grow up, the parents make sure that they have enough budget for the schooling and education of the children for their future. New clothes, bags, shoes and school needs become priorities. Parents sacrifice with their old clothes and limited simple food so long as their children can have something, go to school and prepare for their own future.

This is parental love. Parental love can be shared to others who wants to serve like what a parent does too.

Children’s love is filial piety. The loyalty, obedience, respect, attendance of the children to their parents is a kind of love that also needs to be nurtured starting from their young age up to and beyond his maturity.

I remember my classmate in high school before who observed me giving most of my time only to studies. “Why aim for 90% when 75% is a passing grade?” I meditate on that question by my classmate who teased me to join their fun and barkadahan.

I reflected on the sacrifices of my parents who have seven children going to school in college, high school and elementary those times. I can’t afford to risk my studies giving my time to my classmates while I knew the sacrifices of my parents working hard, tightening their belts, saving money if not borrowing or loaning money for our school fees. Because of these foundation, I and my siblings tried our best to fulfill thier dreams too by studying hard. I wrote a letter to my parents answering the question from my classmate why I aim for 90% when 75% was a passing grade already. It was my way of saying thank you to my parents whose sacrifices and hardwork, whose love and care to all of us were equated to their pains and difficulties. I still dont know what and how to call that attitude of a son towards parents. It was only a practice I did for them.

Children’s love can also be expressed towards, grandparents, aunties and uncles or even to teachers and elders. Like parental love, children’s love is more towards verticality between young ones and elders.

Siblings love is the love of the brothers and sisters between and/or among themselves. Sharing, helping, understanding, teamworking and the like are mores and norms. Extendedly, this kind of love can also be reflected towards friends, playmates, neighbors and classmates.

Social projects like colelcting bottle caps to raise funds to help anybody in need is also an example of siblings love. I remember last school year, the studnet council did the bottle cap collections where each cap is saleable to the recycling industries. Hence, a good fundraising for a good cause.

The last kind of love is the conjugal love. It is the love between the married husband nad wife. I said married as the couples are set to have the blessing of holy marriage and their relationship is God-centered. The husband is for the wife and the wife is for the husband. The two becomes one. Their family names is one. Their house and shelter is set as they are to go to their own home.

The husband’s love is for his wife. His income, his dream, his life is for his wife and family. In like manner, the wife’s lvoe is only for her husband, her dreams, her decisions, her house plan and all the rest has to be aligned to her husband’s. Hence, making a harmonius relationship in their home.

Moreover, their sexual life is exclusively for each other. The husband’s sexual organ is for her wife and vice versa. This conjugal love is exclusive between them as God set in His original plan. In this regard, only the conjugal love between hunband and wife could not be extended but exclusive for them only.

Incest, polygamy, adultery and other related sexual acts are sexual immoralities that go beyond the realm of conjugal love. These must be resolved by keeping the exclusiveness of conjugal love between the husband and wife and nothing more.

Parental love is the most precious love among the four kinds of love . Moreover, conjugal love is the most sensitive and exclusive love for a happy married couple.

Love, Life and Lineage. a testimony on my March and the 21st day of it

March is a month of turning point. School year ends. Contractual teachers may also end up their contracts and job. Graduates are teary grateful and sad to leave their 2nd home, the school and the like.

March was also the birth-month of my deceased Papang, I treasure him. Our family keeps a celebration on his birth anniversary as we honor his life and love to all of us.

This year, the month of to me March is a challenge. I give my prayers and hope to have my contract renewed as an ALT teacher. The challenge is still on as I fight for the renewal of it.

One thing a bit new to me here in Japan was to meet new friends of common skin color last Sunday as I was trying to take time to have a pause when I parked my bike. I noticed three Filipinos who just arrived too with their bikes. I asked, “Pinoy?” And they nodded. I went to greet them and offered my hand to each of them. They are just 6 months in Japan as trainees sent by a Japanese company based in Laguna to Japan. That reminded me on my first months after arrival too in Japan, full of sorrows, pains and challenges. I wished to offer them more orientation on Japan way of life of Filipinos. Hence I invited them to a seminar for Filipino friends we have set dated March 21st in Suwa with Eddie P and Ronie D.

Yesterday, after some phone follow ups, it were Ronald and Raul who could come and they joined us to Suwa. Eddie P has his friends Jing, Mia, and Evelyn too in Suwa. Moreover our Yamanashi friends Jenjen Y together with her husband and a new Korean friend Ms. Ju came. We have a wonderful gathering and have a fellowship lunch with Filipino dishes prepared by the Fil-Jap couples. Our guests were so delighted with the long missed Filipino foods such as pinakbet made by Eddie, humba made by Ronie, Kare-kare with ginisang bagoong, Bopis made by Carmela, pansit made by Jenjen, buko majablanca made by Eddie and others.

After the lunch, Ronie and I inivited them to the lecture area to continue our exchanges more formally. After an introductory message by Ronie D. I was tasked to present a modified view of the Principle for OFWs particularly the Filipinos staying abroad or in Japan. I have to consider my audience who were OFW trainees and the former entertainers too.

The purpose of Life and the Life of married-OFWs was my first emphasis in the presentation. I also presented the root cause of the fall of man with emphasis of family breakdown which was once presented to OFWs by the CBPC Episcopal Commission for Migrant Workers. I also sighted the poor move of the government who just simply offer to migrant workers in the airport an orientation on safe sex by using condoms as they depart as OFWs. They could not attend the case of moral issues of the married Filipino couples but only let them use condoms while they are far from their spouses.

The gospel of Jesus who taught the Jewish people a new way on who will throw the first stone to the caught adulterous woman was a delight to the eyes of the Filipina entertainers. ”Whoever has not committed a sin may throw the first stone for her death.” And in silence, the Jewish people dropped one by one their stones and left the adulterous woman. Jesus said to the woman, “Go and sin no more.”

Comparing this to a government who simple offered the use of condoms for safe sex to departing immigrant workers, two contrasting lifestyles are seen. Jesus taught the woman to go and not to commit adultery anymore is one. The other one is telling the departing Filipinos to use condoms when they are to make sex with others while they are far from their spouses when working abroad as OFWs. It indirectly allows the immgrant workers to commit adultery in a sense with safe sex emphasized.

The explanation of the root cause of the fall of man was clearly presented. The participants were interactive too as they tried to check their lifestyles as OFWs. In short, they understand where they are at and get what the precautionary message is to avoid the fall of man and keep a moral foundation for his family. It is a difficult responsibility to control man’s sexual emotion and desire but God’s ideal plan for each family is so clear.

Ms. Ju, a Korean PLA and a graduate from Sun Moon University also supplemented the presentation with the four kinds of love. She empahiszed the exclusiveness of the conjugal love compared to the other kinds of love. She too has a nice, though brief supplement lecture. She served for three years in the Philippines working in PLA or Pure Love Alliance in Mindanao. She is blessed to marry a Japanese spouse too from Yamanashi, the place of Mr. and Mrs. Jenjen Yamaguchi.

Love, Life and Lineage: Living as Dead

Thank you my dear friends for your visit and readings! I am happy to say that some freshmen in this lectures and men and women are learning the universal principles through this posting of my lectures based from Unification Principles, philosopies, worldviews and rich experiences. They raised their questions and made clarifications though YM with me too.

One question was: How about those who have commited sexual sins? Are they dead and no more chance to be back or to live with God? Another one was a case: A husband made a sexual affair with another woman and later talked with his wife about it. The wife simply accepted her husband and was not angry. No fight or quarrel between them. Was there a sin committed by a husband?

In the news recently, child abuses made by the Catholic priests cost hundreds of thousands of dollars, a lot of money from the churchgoers. Are the sexually abusive priests and other religious clerics dead or alive in the eyes of God?

The government offered advises and orientations to immigrant workers (OFW) on safe sex. The government is fully aware on the sexual activities of the immigrants outside and far from their families. That is immorality. Yet they only offer the advises of using condoms and other safe sex measures. Are there no preventions on immoralities but mere prevention on acquiring HIV and other sexual diseases that the government would do to their taxpayers?

God is love. It is from His love that life exist, the world, man and the rest of living creations.

But man's separation from God when the first man and woman disobeyed the commandment not to eat nor touch the forbidden fruit, made man's lineage shifted to tha false lineage, Hence man is dead in the lineage of God. But God's plan is absolute. God wants to restore his creations back to his oiginal plan. Hence there was a providential stage by stage restoration of humanity. We can see and trace that along the lines of history.

Going to the questions, man who committed sexual sins are "dead" in the lineage of God. But man can repent of his mistake, confess to God and His representative in the providence and offer indemnity conditions to make up his faith and oneness with God. This will be further elaborated in the Principle of restoration. In the law of commerce, damages or anything lost along the way in the business should be indemnified. Just like on guaranteed products. Payment for what was lost or damaged is called indemnity. If man has damaged the lineage as planned by the Creator, then, man should pay for that. In a sense, man who committed the sexual sins, should offer indemnity conditions for them to be engrafted back to God first by establishing again their faith to Him through their offerings, prayers of repentance and forgiveness of their sins.

We can remember the story of the adulterous woman caught in the act by the Jewish people in the gospel. They brought her to the teacher Jesus and asked him on what to do with the woman. As if the Jewish people was also testing Jesus that time if he was for the Jewish law to stone to death anybody caught in adulterous act. After a moment of reflecting Jesus replied and said that who ever is pure and have not committed any sin can throw the first stone to the adulterous woman. There was silence. And after a while, stones from the hands of the angry Jewish people began to drop to the ground and they disappeared. The woman was shaking on the ground looking to her possible death. In her mind was the repentance and a looking for a chance to surive. When all the Jewish people left, Jesus said to the woman, " Stand! Go and sin no more."

The heart of forgiveness is love. Parent of mankind has that love. But man as sinful children should do his part to repent and pray for another chance to live with Him.

The case of the wife who after hearing or knowing that her husband committed a sexual sin but simply accepted her husbnad back to their family is analytical. It can be possible that the wife has not valued much the morality and fidelity. Wife should know the consequence of sexual sin. It is death from God's lineage. It menas that her children too will no longer be in the lineage of God i f the father has fallen. It maybe that the wife was so forgiving as well. But forgiveness is not enough. There should be payment of what was lost, or else, the sin could be repeated by the husband having a precedent that his wife could simply accept him. Jesus didnot say no stoning. He said, "whoever have not committed the sin can throw hte first stone." In a sense, there should be indemnity by the person. Stand! Go and sin no more. Man should stand up again an sin no more; meaning after the fall, man should make a new beginning and be one with God.

Sexually abusive priests are men. Their bodies was designed by God just like ordinary man. They also have the instinct of having sexual desires. Yet, in their modern vows, they are made to pledge to keep their chastity as a condtion of their faith and marriage to the central figure of the church.

In a principle point of view, chastity is a condition to pay the lost life due to the fall of man. But that is only a symbolic condition to keep their faith. Once the faith has reconnected man to God, then action and substantialization of faith is necessary. Faith without action id dead as said in the gospel. In a sense, chastity after a period of time should have made the purification of man and open a new door for man to be blessed to multiply God's lineage by having children of goodness and righteousness.

Priests may have spent a long time of purification in their chastity. They too should be blessed to have the lineage of God, substantiated to and by having their own children. Hence, their sexual desires is just normal and should be addressed by the church by allowing them to be blessed with a spouse. The church has no solution on this child abuse by the clerics. Money of the churchgoers are shifted for settlement and fines. That is not an absolute solution on the sexual needs of the clerics as man. Marry and bless priests, now! This was the cry of Archibishop Milingo.

The government has several agencies to address immorality. Education, Social Welfare, PCGG and the like. Even each insitution has its local policies to keep a standard form of morality in their insitution. Legislators too are trying to bridge the church policies in their deliberations and passing of the bills like the reproduction bills, abortion cases and so on.

But there is no clear program in the government to address the pain of sexual sins. Life imprisonment for rapes does not stop man to rape. Teaching immigrnats to use condoms and other safe sex measures do not solve sexual immorality but even sides the growing family breakdwowns among OFWs as mentioned by the Episcopal Commission for Migrants Workers of CBPC. A new expression of Truth should heal this ancestral wound of sexual sins.

Truth usually hurts. Like a medical surgery, there is pain on the process and healing period. Scars even remained. In like manner, Truth is painful but it does not mean to hurt but to offer a solution, to make a change from sinfulness to righteousness. As Fr. Jerry Orbos said, "There are times when love hurts, must hurt, if only to bring forth greater love".

Love, live and the lineage of God should be kept by man!

(This article is wirtten by Dr. Cadano. To use or copy this needs permission from him. Comments and questions are welcome for healthy discussion.)

Love, Life and Lineage: issues on relationships

Dear Friends and Buddies,

I felt energized to write for more after I received some comments from you. Although I have a purpose and mission as I begun this writings, your being with me in this e-evangelization gives me a sign of a healthy start and thus, proceed. Thank you for being with me along the way.

I am geared to talk about the various issues on relationships in the real world and offer some advise on how to avoid if not solve their cases.

One former student of mine who graduated already became successful in his career as a seaman. When we met again in the college when he visited his alma mater, he shared his then fresh experiences in his life aboard the ship.

When they were docked somewhere in Mexico, he noticed that there were many prostitutes aboard the docked ship. Keeping his faith to morality, he went to his cabin to isolate himself. Nevertheless, he later noticed that someone was opening his cabin and a Mexican prostitute came in, using a master key. The seaman was cornered and soon “raped” and was later asked for money in return.

It may be a different angle of the common stories that seamen were used to buy port-partners when their ship was in the prot or docked. Seamen call them for temporary happiness through sexual release. Married seamen are often called by his wife as “seaman-loloko”.

I asked my student if he was happy in his life as a seaman. He said, he was satisfied with the salary but not on the eventual ”happenings” and immoralities in the port. He said, his conscience stike him always. I then advised him to shift to a better job where he is safe and free to meet his goal in life. It is not only money that matters in the long run. Today, I learned that the seaman has his own electronics and computer shop, blessed and married and have two children. He has his own time to manage his own entrepreneur business freely.

Fatherless children

As I too was on my first months here in Japan, my nihonggo classmate was a teenager in his sixteen. He was a son of a single-mother “japayuki” who later got married to a Japanese. He was also fresh in Japan and has to study nihonggo like me. I invited him to listen to my lectures too. He listen to a whole day seminar with his new Filipino friend who has the same status like him. They understood that they were results of the fallen single mothers. They ask me then if they have the right to live with their unplanned existence. They feel that their mother made a mistake and they are by-product of those mistakes. Are they to blame their mother?

I told them, of course, that they are human beings and are citizens on this land. If their mother made a mistake, they have their life now that needs to be face the real world. Blames would not solve but degrade more their life. The thing is, they need to be back to God as the author of life. They have to marcot or engraft their lineage back to God’s lineage. They can do it first by being faithful to God, keep the tradition of being one with God and discover further the moral ways in life. I have not met the two young men as they were enrolled to their high school. I have heard only that they have their sideline job in Mcdonald fastfood in the day-time and study during the night in high school. I know, they have lots of challenges in this new foreign nation like me. Their life is vague but they have to be loved too. I pray for them.

Husband’s “husbandry”

Some husbands I knew also openned up to me. They were mostly my students before in the state university, in my martial arts club who could connect to me through cyberspace. Others, who were near my place in La Union visited me too during my vacation and visits in the Philippines. We have nice sharings.

The problems of the husbands is mostly common. They have one if not two mistresses aside from their own wife. I listened to their stories applying the basic method in psychology: active listening. They said that during their single years after they passed the board and gain their employment, they only court and aim to have a wife. Hence, they got married i ntheir early 20’s. But during their married life, they happen to meet other women. They just greeted these ladies as they met along the way, in their office, in their works and the like. But they were befriended later by the ladies, asked them to join them in their coffee break, to meet each other after the work, to go home together. That made the start of their bonding. Do I have to tell more what happened next?

After listening, I asked them why do they have to bite the sexual hooks of the temptous ladies, when they have already their own wife? Is his wife not a satisfaction for his sexual desire? Is there no healthy sexual relations between them as couples?

There were variety of answers. One husband said that after the birth of his first or second child, he has no sexual activity with his wife. Of course, the wife who just had delivered a baby was still recuperating from the pains after delivering the baby. It takes 2 to three months for them to be healed from. It was mostly that time that the husband was looking for something. And being danced and cordonned by those temptous ladies, they venture sexual life with other partner/s.

Like the seaman who tried to isolate himself from immorality, there were often times that the woman made the first “dance” to attract man. In those times of abstinence for husbands, they know they have their wives, but their sexual desire is just within them. When the time that woman came to him, it became difficult for man/husband to control himself ones the attraction and stimulation are present even if he was aware the woman was not his wife.

In a survey by American study, from teenagers to single adults, man averagely make self-stimutation by doing masturbation in two to three times per week. In like manner, married couples are considered to have healthy sexual relations having an average of three to five sexual activities per week. Less than ten affairs in a year is considered sexlless marriage and unhealthy in that survey.

When I asked individually some husbands, they revealed that they only have an average of once to twice a month affair with his wife. Others have once in two months. The OFW’s have their different stories too. It’s varied that they went back to self-stimulation like when they were still single, or, the left spouse was attracted to a new partner, if not, the OFW has been attracted to a friend where he or she is based. Can you consider that as healthy sexual life? Husband and wife are both needed to make something on this. Or else one may look for another.

Sexual Ethics

The question here is on sexual ethics of the married couples.

There are probable cases that when the husband desires to have sex, his wife is not giving in for him. What is the importance of sex for the married couple then?

Sexual ethics is meant between blessed and married husband and wife. Rev. Fr. Sun Myung Moon in his Sunday sermons often reiterates that husband and wife’s love between each other needs to be maintained whatever circumstance may occur in their married life. Man’s organ is designed for his wife and owned by his wife. In like manner, the wife’s sexual organ is designed for her husband and owned by her husband starting when they are blessed and married. It is only during the sexual activity that husband and wife could become one; the two become one in the image and likeness of the Maker. Thus they become co-maker of God’s children giving a Godly lineage to their children and the next generation..

Sexual abstinence is a big factor resulting to the attitudinal irritation of the spouse. He or she got easily angry on the absence of sexual relations. Because of that, their children are usually scolded and became a spring board of his or their irritations and disappointments.

Being given no chance by his wife to have a healthy sexual relations, man is tempted to find another partner for his temporary happiness, basically unknown from the wife. But when the wife would discover it, the trouble and domestic war begins.

In this sense, wife should also do her part. If she cooks food that is for the family. She do laundry works for the clothes of her children too. But food, clothing, shelter and sex, are prime needs of man. Hence she should not only prepare food, clothings or clean the shelter but also prepare for her husband the right “food” for their bedtime activity including praying to the Creator that she can offer healthy, ethical sexual relation with her husband and/or vis-a-vis.

(This article is originally written by Dr. Cadano. Anybody who wish to copy this is required to ask permission from him. Comments and questios are welcome for healthy discussions.)

Love, Life and Lineage: relations and reality

Dear Friends and buddies,

My first episode yesterday re Love, Life and lineage (LLL): letter of advise to families, was philosophically based and theologically referred. It was the moral situations of families that pushed me to continue this writing to give them e-guidance and references. In my side, I offer this to Him as my way of contributing in the evangelization of Truth and as a teacher, keep my vocation to help people help themselves as well.

I would like to invite you all to join me in going to the real family relationships, the society they lived, and the world in reality and discuss the cause and effect of the problems in the real world..

Many families are experiencing chaotic situations due to to economic struggles, and poor communication between and among them. More than that, the society they lived in now is gearing towards materialism, egoism and daily whispered by news on graft-and-corruption and other immoralities and several cover-ups in the government. It makes their daily start heavy then.

Today, families are struggling in dealing with their responsibilities as conjugal partners, as parents to their growing children, dealings with their neighbors and settling their bills.

The usual scenario of the father is he is kept to serve a company or employer for a living and his time was mostly in there. He got very less time for his family. Mothers too are prone to be servant-like in the house doing care-giving works to the children, daily kitchen works, cleaning routine, doing laundry and policing the grown up children. She could not go to work for a living too like her husband as she became a fulltime parent-laborer in the house. Parenting becomes her 99% focus.

When I asked some couples on how frequent they communicate with each other, most of them have less chance to talk on family matters except on the bills, the kitchen supplies, the school fees and needs of the children. A family vision, dream or plan for the whole family is not tackled. There is no clear direction for the family on where to be, but just simply survive with the daily needs.

Eventually, most fathers applied for OFW contracts and work abroad to meet the needs of his family. Hence, the mother or vis-a-vis, is left to take care of the children. In this situation, the conjugal relationship of the couples is shelved. No night affairs for a year or two. Would that be healthy for both? Hmmmmm! Husband, as a married couple, is it okay for you to sleep alone without your partner with you at night? Is your mind at peace? How about you Mrs wife? Dont you remember emotional needs during the nights with your partner? The one or two year contracts of the OFW-spouses broke these conjugal relations. And to meet the human desires, some immoral problems occur. Later, family breakdown occur and statistics says, the family breakdown among OFW's is sky-rocketing. The spouse left at home met another partner if not the OFW has found someone with him. This is not a generalization but cases we found among them.

For couples staying their own country, there are still many limitations where immorality is high. Adultery, polygamy, incest, homosexuality and the like are just somewhere around the corner.

In like manner, children are sent to schools with the good support of the parents The OFW has an ace on this as they can sned good financial backing for their children. But OFW-children have no principal teacher in their first school, their home. Parent is the first teacher of their children. Parent is the first partner for his sports activity. Parent is his dual partner in his solo and duet singing. Parent is the first police to give discipline and supervise the children. Parent is the first priest of the children to let the children know and recognized the Almighty Parent of humankind. But the absence of the OFW-parent made all these educational courses a failure! Hence, children are illiterate in their first school of learning on what is love and life.

In like manner, normal children who are with their parents are not enrolled in their first home. Parents donot act as teacher. They only bring them to their second teacher in public or private schools. Parents donot usually offer family time with their children but have time on drinking spree or shopping desires. They leave it all to their yaya's or lola's and the children could not realize the importance of family values and culture.

How did all these things happen? Let us look first on the couples.

The supposed to be first father and mother of man named Adam and Eve, were to grow and develop first to their maturity. Their goal is to be perfect, be fruitful individuals. Their education while growing was necessary and a pre-requisite for their next course to make a family. Their First Teacher, God, gave them a direction (others called it a test. Was it really? not to eat the fruit on the tree of the knowledge of good and evil or else they will die. Human history in the first book, Genesis 2:27 said that man could eat anything in the garden except the forbidden fruit while they were studying the course of life in their Garden of Eden school. But the first lady disobeyed the direction of their Teacher. She was tempted to eat the fruit by another being and ate the forbidden fruit together. She passed it to her classmate, the growing man and they also ate it togehter for the second time. When their Teacher God learned about it, they were thrown away from the Garden of Eden school. They felt so ashamed of their mistakes and cover their private parts with fig leaves. Adam and Eve fall and left. Thus, the unplanned and false lineage came to exist.

No parent would ever test his children by putting an aromatic bread on the table and say not to eat a bread on the table because there is a poison in there and will cause their death. In like manner, God did not test Adam and Eve with a mere fruit.

They were pure and naked while they were in the Garden of Eden. But after they ate the fruit, they were so ashamed to face God and cover their private parts with fig leaves. It is our human nature to hide or conceal parts of our bodies that committed a mistake or has some dirt on it.We hide them from our parents, teachers, friends or supervisors. If you hold something forbidden, you hide your hands. If you are eating a food not yours and was caught, you cover your mouth. Right? Our conscience dictate that it was a mistake. So man hide it.

In like manner, the eating of the forbidden fruit which made Adam and Eve hide their sexual parts was an immoral untimely sexual act. God prohibited man not to engage to sexual contacts before they are blessed and multiply their family. Man has to keep his purity before their holy marriage and blessing. That was the reason why Adam and Eve were so ashamed when God learned about their pre-marital sexual activity. That was the origin of sin of man leading man to his "death" or separation from the source of life, Creator. Is a a forbidden fruit worth more than life? It is the purity and integrity of man which can equate life.

If we understood the root cause of the fall of man, we can easily understand why man is so dominated by selfishness or egoism; why man covet his neighbors; why man is so greedy and the like. It is not food or clothing or shelter but sex always become uncontrollable in man. It is the root cause why from the early age in their puberty, teenagers are prone to pornography, untimely marriage, teenage pregnancy, rape, molestation, homosexual activities, unwanted children, abortion and the like. Man inherited these odds from the origin of sin.

Issues even inside the church are getting heavier as seen in the media and reality. Have you heard of the recent Catholic nun in India who revealed after she left from her vow, the immoralities inside the convent involving lesbianism and priests? the priests' sexual abuses in America and even in the Philippines? the open gay archbishop making divisions in the protestant churches? These are current unresolved cases even in the religious communities. Sex is seen as uncontrollable by man who never understood the ideals of the three blessings and purpose of life.

Even in the Muslim faith, circumcision was a religious ritual to purify the sexual organ of man, sheding blood from his sex organ to pay the lost life called death when man committed the first sin. Filipinos practiced that since. But boys going to circumcision by now mostly during summer time no longer know the significance of "tuli" or circumcision but just bring his courage to be circumcized and soon proud to be considered as already a young adult.

That was the cause of these past and present immoralities. It just multiply to more selfishness going further to robbery, fightings, tribal wars, killings and gang rapes, adultery and other traumatic experiences and holocaust.

Man's connection to His Creator, the strengthening of man's faith is a basic thing to reverse this unplanned reality. You can trace how man tried to go back to God from Noah's family to Abrham's family to Moses and the Israelite tribes or nation. Even the Mosaic law clearly says not to covet thy neighbors or commit adultery. Thus, correcting the old sin.

Our real world today is so blind enough to understand all these. They even fight for same-sex marriage forgetting that even the unsolved global aids problem started or traced from homosexual relationship.

(This article is originally written by Dr. Cadano with a purpose. Permission to copy this is required. Comments are welcome for discussion purposes.)

Life in Japan and Haran

Living in Japan sounds a dream to most Filipinos. For old Filipinos, hearing the word Japanese is a mix-up of hatred, war, comfort women, hukbalahap, and other memoirs during the WWII.

As I was blessed to a Japanese wife, I look more on the cross-cultural climate that we would have. I got a chance too to look on our history with the Japanese during the war.

My late father told me that Japanese soldiers landed on the shore in Bauang, La Union and happen to make their camp just at the back where the house of his grandparent was. It was just a stone-throw away he said. They have to run to the nearby mountain for a refuge the time. He remembered that his mother with his grand mother had to go down back to their house during night time to get some food stuffs left in their shanties.

One late afternoon, they noticed that Japanese soldiers were most if not all lying down on the grasses. They discovered that the soldiers ate the fruit of the tuba-tuba as they thought is was a good fruit to eat. The soldiers suffered diarrhea the time because of that. That was more than 55 years ago.

Since 2005, my almost 4 years of stay in Japan was not that favorable.

My first year here was much of sacrifices living in an old apartment far from technology. We had a poor toilet room there with no toilet chair nor a flush. The hole is direct to the ground hole. One time that we have our visitor, she changed her mind to sleep to another place instead of staying in our apartment because of that old toilet. I could not get a job for employment and for a living because of language barrier. So I have to go to a Japanese language school offered by the city government. For more than six months, I was just a mere language student, a spouse of a Japanese wife and a no-income father of 5 children struggling to learn their new tongue.

My wife was a part-time worker at the time. I remembered that when she buy a pair of bananas, she have to slice both by three to make six. Enough for them. Sometimes, the unlucky 6th has to be slice again to half to make seven for all of us.

As I met some Filipinos during my first months in Japan, I got a chance to be informed of a technical job painting house roofs located one hour north of where we stay. I took that chance. I found my self on top of house roofs during day time doing hte cleaning of the roofs before my boss will do the actual painting. I have to use a pressured water-hose to smash rusts and dirts on the metal roofs before we do the painting. The big powered-water-hose was strong enough that once it is not hold properly, it can force your hands out the hose and smash you down the roof.

I was so happy to hand to my wife my first yen bill wage after a week. But that was just for two weeks. Later, I found myself inside an mini-theater type night club which was about to open. I was first doing clerical works for the company, but later I was their waiter, janitor, snow-shoveler to clear the parking space and road, and the like. After a month, I was again on the street looking for another possible living.

After my wife's application to rent a government housing, I asked my wife to consider having an Internet in that new government apartment. And only there that I could find myself browsing for possible job. I got a luck after several applications I made. A school needs a curriculum developer which was one of my MA courses before in PSU Urdaneta. The job was good for me but the office environment and medium made me deaf and isolated from the world for more than two years. Working with nobody to talk to is not a normal routine for an office employee. As I was working on English curriculum, all my companions are nihongo speaking and have nothing about English. My nihongo lessons too were all overshadowed by the bulks of my English materials and works the time.

As I tried taking care of my growing children, they have adopted the new environment and could fastly flow to the nihongo worlds as they are completely into it during school time and with their mother in our apartment. More that when they go to nihongo tutorial classes after their normal class, the more that they are into it. Moreover, their friends and weekend companions in their ball games helped them to be emerged in it.

After my three years in curriculum development was over, I got a chance to find a new job as ALT teacher and part time conversation-class teacher in the evening to professionals wanting to learn more on English conversation. However, my world was so limited in teaching English and almost nothing more. Fellow teachers don't speak in English. English classes are taught in nihongo explanations.

At home, I have nobody to talk to when my wife would talk to our children in nihongo. I just put my self to the house chores from laundry, cleaning, garbage disposal, kitchen chore and the like. Sometimes, I found myself venturing more into the garbage houses looking on what were those condemned and thrown materials that can still be adopted or recycled. I found a little fun to those I can restore from it. In a way, there are something in it that still can serve a purpose. There are old chairs, cabinet, pillows, blankets, bedding's, plates, used clothing, curtains and the like. Hence, recycle or restoration. Washing and ironing are basic ways before using them as God's creations.

Nowadays, Japan is in recession. Many foreigners are being laid-off from job. As they were employed, they don't have the regular benefits that the Japanese get from their employers. When there is retrenchment, the foreigners were the one being laid off first. Par time jobs were also hard to get even now. ALT teachers too are out from their work as the school year is about to end. Belt-tightening is the mode since last year to most Filipinos in Japan. Yet, their extended families in the Philippines, their friends, their sponsored scholars, their churches and organizations believed that they are great donors and rich sponsors.

My family too has been suffering and is also affected. Since December 26, we experienced eating rice meal only once a day. The rest are mostly noodles as part of belt-tightening. Thanks to some friends who offer some kilograms of rice. It made me became a like a beggar.

As I am in my fourth year in Japan, I still could not make direct complete nihongo sentence to play their tongue here. Sorry for that. My psycho motor is not that aggressive and active as before. I still am struggling to have an ace in their tongue. It means, I have poor conversation still with the Japanese, the store tellers, the bus drivers, the neighbors and others. In the school, my medium is English as it is the subject I am teaching. Off the class, when I try practicing my nihongo, students answer me the foul. I ask the name of the food and they give me the name of a baseball player with their laughs. I ask my wife the name of the flower and she usually just give me the "shiranai" reply meaning I dont know!

I saw myself in a bookstore. All the stuffs are in nihongo. English books are the review books for TOEC and STEP tests and nothing more.

Look for a job. The information you will get is in nihongo. Go and travel. The driver, the map, the route tags are in nihongo. I decided to walk and let nature satisfy my travel. Several times I go to a hospital for a check up and the doctors would talk to me in nihongo. The medicines are in nihongo too. Did I get the right medicine for my sickness? What shall I do?

I remember having a counselling with an old Japanese adviser. She first listen to my wife and they have their exchanges, compassion and understanding. She favored her fellow Japanese in front of me. The next talk, she talked to me privately and favored me in the absence of my wife. That was a Japanese way. It does not meet two points but created two directions.

Jacob went to Haran and stayed there for three 7 years in three courses, a total of 21 years. Jacob's first seven year course is so sacrificial to be a servant in his uncle's place. I am wondering it I too will have the same course in my stay in Japan with my family still trying to adopt the culture, the language, the education, as I am struggling to look for my freedom, my stability, my way to fulfill a life-mission and the fulfillment of true love and life with His lineage.

Four years and I still am to look for the next three years for my 7-year course in Japan, my Haran. Do I have to make a seven-year life course in Japan like Jacob in Haran?

Third Week of February 2009

February as a special month for me seems to be a month full of variety of activities particluarly this third week. Although I have no external celebration during my ...thieth birthday and valentine's day, looking and moving forward made me stand to keep with my vision and mission.

Last Monday, I went to my conversation class and until 7:30 in the evening. Japanese professionals like to sharpen and twist their tounge to English conversation. Moreover, last Wednesday I was inivited to speak to two Japanese learning groups. One is headed to go to Oregon, USA for a city sisterhood activity. They asked me to check their basic English they studied in preparation for their US travel. After that activity, immediately I have to speak in another group lead by a city councilor of Tomi City, about Philippine Culture in front of more than a dozen of Japanese citizens. Some are retired ones while others were still ontheir late 20's or early 30's.

To share the brief history of Philippines to non-Filipinos or foreigners give me a pride as there are many hidden beauty about Philippines which were over-shadowed by the bad or sad image they know about my country. Eventually, they raised questions about tourism, food, transportaion about Philippines. But they were also surprised about the sufferings of Philippines during the colonialization and world wars as they can see how a country could go over the pains if it was attacked and dominated by other countries like Japan and Spain.

Although it was a nice and opportunity to share something about Philippines free of charge, it offers me joy to serve my country in an indirect way.

Yesterday, an old Filipina friend invited Nagano Core group to share some lecture presentations and internal guidance. Ronie together with his family, Eddie and his two boys and I went to Yamanashi, about 3-hour ride from our place. Thanks to Ronie Delos Santos family who offered their van for us.

It was Jenjen Eslopor married to a Japanese who hosted the event in Ichikawa City, Yamanashi ken. It was also the birthday of her husband that day. So, it was a double purpose to gather her Filipina frieds with their families to listen to some presentations too. After the birthday lunch, Jenjen explained the next activity which was the presentaiton of Family Values by Ronie delos Santos. He presented topics based from Divine Principles emphasizing on the idelas of a family unit, the root cause of family chaos, the different kinds of love as family is a school of love. The participants were interactive to the presentation while desert and coffee and tea were served. Others continued lsitening while also having some picks from the foods nicely prepared by Jenjen and a few of her close friends. Her husband said, it was the first time in is life to have a birthday cleebration with lots of visitors and dynamic celebration including the fellowhip and lecture presentations. There were Japanese husbands too who listened to the presentations as one of htem can even speak Tagalog.

My part wasto supplement the mian presentation of Ronie. Yet, as I found a little much time, I also gave an Internal Guidance to the Filipina wives on family affairs and their role to the Filipino and Japanese communities, to Philippines as their native country and on how to keep a broad vision aside from their own family. There was a spark on their eyes to listen that there are Filipino children who still go to school with unmatched slippers and having recycled plastic bags as their school bags while chidlren here in Japan used their ransel worth Y50,000 yen or P25,0000 pesos in their country. Many needs help and Filipina mothers here can offer great help by collecting their unused clothes and offer it to Filipinos who are victims of typhoons and calamities in Philippines. That can offer joy to many instead of just throwing them to Japan garbagge. We noticed too that some listeners even took some notes from the presentaitons as we envision that a planted seed of truth and love will grow in one's heart.

The presentations were intorductory but we target to have the listeners eyes open to many things that they can do to make their family a happy and loving family and to look onto others who also need their love and do something to offer happiness to the needy. The compassion to serve and offer to others make them true sons and daughters of God. Jenjen and her husband were to thankful to the Nagano core team making her desire to educate their friends is hit at this time.

We went home passing Suwa City of Nagano ken where the wife of Eddie san, Mrs Keko Panuncia prepared a dinner for us the core team of Nagano. After that quality fellowhip with the Panuncia family Ronnie with his family and I continued to travel back to our Nagano City saying we made a day and a closing night of minus 6 degrees celsius but so warm in our heart.

Valentine's day of the lonely

Getting older calls for a transformation on cultural and social affairs in life. Unlike the teens and the early adult-life that during Valentine's day particularly in the Philippines is full of surprises.

There were times that students would just leave their hand-made card on the teacher's table. And you found out htat some students are heartistic to you as children. Some would surprise you to offer roses even if you are a man. And in thecard of it, you found some students wanting to offer you joy as well.

At home, Valentine7s day is joyous as there is always kisses and greetings! That was common onthe modern Philippines already.

But in Japan, aside that they dont celebrate Valentine's day, there are malls displaying hearts and banners of Valentine's day calling for a better markei from the public. Nothing more!

At home in Japan, there is no Valentine's day too. I made a hand-made card made of recycle paper cut-outs. I gave it to my eldest son yet, it is for all of them. I got no response. My wife is only a woman in the house. She mothers the kids and blinds herself on her husband. Maybe, there is no more attraction between.

Love has to go beyond age. I hope to discover more the culture of love in the twilight zone. This is a new challnege and learning for me too.

To the lonely and "home alone" persons, happy valentine's day!

Father, Son and the Spirit Between

This is a set of father-son stories of a few families. They vary but it has one common denominator.

An OFW-father wrote to me on his sadness. He could not see nor touch his son when after few months from birth, the baby ascended to the other world. There was no chance for the father to see his baby directly or personally. This is because of the yearly month-long vacation provided to OFW's by most of the companies. Ans as the father just have a few chance to visit and be with his wife, then the wife is left again pregnant while the husband goes back to the other country to work. The baby was born without the father. Unfortunately, the baby died while the father is still under a contract outside the country.

Another story was from a son, shared to me by the mother. His father is also an OFW. Incidentally, the son have seen a friendster homepage where he saw a picture of his father with another woman. He showed it to his mother and asked who was that woman beside his father? I got a chance to communicate with the father of the son. He told me he will solve the problem very soon.

It is one essential problem of OFW's, the breakdown of a family unit. Called as hero by the Philippine government but known as family provider by the son and not as a loving father.

The third story was from a father who discovered just recently that his three-year old son who still could not speak, is autistic. The case of the autistic son was referred to specialist and the baby boy was recommended to a rehabilitation program of autistic children. Each session for the rehabilitation costs P2,500. It means, that if there will be once a week session, that will cost P10,000 per month for the working father. P20,000 if there will be two sessions per week for the baby's rehabilitation.

The father brought his emotion to me and asked me, "why his son? why that way?"

Moreover, there is a father who truly aim to have a son with his wife. After several medical consultation and technological trials, they could not make it. Until one day, a couple offered them a baby to be adopted without any cost. They were so happy to accept the baby. Rumors spread about the baby in the neighborhood. They are bothered if the time comes when the baby will discover his real life.

I also have my story being an epileptic son. I was already 18 years old when I discover that I am epileptic. It happened when I got a seizure and I fall to a concrete wall which made my two front-teeth broken. I was brought to the doctor due to my broken teeth. But only my sister helped me to have a neurological check-up to diagnose why that seizure happen. She even paid for my check up and EEG as I remember. And the neurologist told me about my case. It was positive.

Should I blame my father or mother why I was born with epilepsy?

I never blame anybody on my case. I tried researching where I inherited that genes but not to blame my ancestor.

There were many opportunities in my life that I could not enjoy because of my case. To have a girlfriend is difficult if she will know that the man courting her is epileptic. Even to get a driver's license is so difficult. Even to apply for an international marriage is questioned on my health case. To get a driver's license and a job abroad too is almost impossible because of the E case. The daily reliever-tablet is getting expensive year after year and I have to use it in my lifetime. It affects one's memory as well. What shall I do?

I have to live my life. No blames. I have to move forward and disregard the seizures. It is part of my life anyway.

The common denominator in the story is the relationship between the father and son. Both have to be good, understand and relate to each other. If there is a problem with one, both can talk to make their spirit supportive to one another. No one should blame the other. History is history. Past is past. But there is a long road still to venture in the future. It is time to move forward and not to be hindered by health, stories or any social problem.

Sometimes, money is needed to cross a bridge along the way. But money should not stop one to move forward. If there is a will there is a way. When there is an end, it is best if one met his end with all his efforts to move forward but never surrender on the road of life.

Isang Sanaysay: Si Tatay

Si Tatay…: an Essay-Writing Contest Winner



1980 ako ipinanganak. Tatlong taon bago pinatay si

Ninoy Aquino at anim na taon bago ang EDSA uprising.

Taon ding ito nang nagkaroon ng malaking krisis sa

langis ang buong mundo. P24.00 ang palitan ng dolyar

sa piso at 48 milyon na ang populasyon ng Pilipinas.

Ito rin ang taong unang pumunta

ng Middle East ang tatay ko para magtrabaho.

Isang karpintero ang Tatay. Isang skilled worker.

Malaki ang pangangailangan ng bansang pupuntahan ni

Tatay sa mga katulad niya. Sabi ng Nanay mahirap daw

ang buhay noong mga panahong iyon. Inabot na raw ang

bansa ng economic depression na galing sa Europa at

Amerika. Kaya minabuti ng Tatay na mag-abroad. Anupa’t

dalawa ang pinag-aaral niya at may bago na naman

siyang bibig na pakakainin.

Parating pinapaalala sa amin ng Nanay na “nagtiis

kaming magkahiwalay ng tatay ninyo para magkaroon tayo

ng maginhawang buhay.” Palibhasa’y parehas galing sa

hirap, kaya siguro ganoon na lamang ang pananaw nila.

Uuwi kada dalawang taon, tapos aalis na ulit

pagkalipas ng dalawang buwan. Ganyan ang

pattern ng buhay ng tatay ko.

Pumutok ang giyera sa Middle East noong 1989. Doon ko

unang narinig ang mga salitang Operation: Desert Storm

at Third Anti-Christ. Nandoon din si Tatay. Isang

beses lamang siya nakatawag sa loob ng tatlong taon

niyang pagkaka-stranded sa bansang iyon. Mabuti naman

daw ang lagay niya. May tirahan naman daw sila at

husto sa lahat ng pangangailangan. Hindi naman daw

sila gagalawin sa giyera sabi ng embahada ng Pilipinas

dahil hindi naman daw sila kasali sa awayan ng

dalawang bansa at ng pakialamerong Amerika. Iyon naman

pala eh, bakit ka pa rin nandyan?! Na-imagine ko na

lang tuloy ang Tatay na parang isa sa mga sibilyan na

dumadaan habang nakikipagbarilan ako sa larong

Operation: Wolf sa SM City. Nang mahawi ang mga usok

ng giyera umuwi na ang Tatay. Wala pang isang taon ay

nakita ko na naman ang aking sarili na nakasakay sa

arkiladong dyip para ihatid ang Tatay sa Airport

papuntang Middle East . Ikaw ba naman ang magkaroon ng

pinag-aaral na nurse, isang seminarista at tatlo pa sa

elementarya. Kailangang kumayod, kailangang kumita.

Kung tutuusin maraming na-miss ang Tatay sa buhay

naming magkakapatid, lalo na sa akin. Wala siya nang

una akong magtalumpati sa entablado. Wala din siya

nang grumadweyt ako ng elementarya at hayskul. Wala

siya nang una akong nakipagsuntukan sa kaklase ko nang

inasar ako nito habang binibigay ko ang libreng

plastic na singsing na galing sa cheese curls sa

kaklase kong babae. Wala din siya para turuan akong

magbasketbol tulad ng ginagawa ng mga kapitbahay ko sa

kanilang anak. Wala rin siya para panoorin si Kuya na

contestant sa Student Canteen at ako naman para

sabitan niya ng medalya para sa mga math competition

na sinalihan ko. Wala siya nang dumating ako sa punto

ng aking buhay, na siya ring kinakatakutan ng lahat ng

katulad kong nagbibinata- -ang magpatuli. Wala rin siya

para turuan akong maglanggas. Wala siya nang

kauna-unahang lumabas ang pangalan ko sa dyaryong

pang-estudyante bilang isang editor. Ipinagtabi ko

siya ng mga kopya para maipagmalaki sa kanyang

pagdating. Wala siya nang una akong tumikim ng alak

dahil binasted ako ng dinidigahan kong babae. Wala rin

siya nang sumubok akong manigarilyo at itapon ito

pagkatapos ng dalawang hithit pa lang.

Wala siya, wala siya parati.

Napansin ko na lamang na mas naiibuhos naming

magkakapatid ang oras naming sa labas ng bahay at sa

eskwelahan. Ang Ate ay kagawad ng Sangguniang

Kabataan, ang Kuya naman ay matagal nang kinuha ng

seminaryo, ang dalawa kong kapatid ay may mga sarili

nang kina-career at ako naman ay natutuon sa aking

pagsusulat.

Dumating ang isa sa pinakamasayang araw ng buhay ko,

ang pagdating ng Tatay at sabihing ito na ang huli

niyang uwi dahil hindi na siya babalik ulit sa abroad.

Makalipas ang ilang buwan, trinangkaso ang Tatay. Sabi

ng doktor ay overfatigue lang daw at kailangan niyang

magpahinga. Pagkaraan nang ilang buwan, na-diagnose na

may tumubong tumor sa utak ng Tatay at malignant na

ito. Minsan naitanong sa akin ng uncle kong doktor

kung nauntog ba ang Tatay o nabagsakan ng mabigat na

bagay sa ulo. Nahihiyang ngiti, kamot sa ulo at isang

“hindi ko po alam” lang ang naisagot ko.

Kung gaano kabilis na nadiskubre ang tumor niya sa

utak ay ganun din kabilis na binawi sa amin ng Diyos

ang Tatay. Habang pinagmamasdan ko ang Tatay habang

mapayapa itong nakahimlay noong

burol niya, nahihirapang tumulo ang luha ko. Kung

tutuusin, hindi ko kilala ang taong ito. Siya ang

tatay ko. Kalahati ng pagkatao ko ay galing sa kanya.

Pero kung tatanungin mo ako kung anong gusto niyang

timpla ng kape, kung allergic ba siya sa hipon na

paborito ko, kung San Miguel o Purefoods ba ang team

niya sa PBA–isang malaking EWAN lang ang maisasagot

ko sa iyo. Noong bata pa ako, nasa abroad ang Tatay.

Kapag nandito naman siya para magbakasyon, mas

malaking oras ang nagugol niya sa pag-aasikaso ng mga

papeles niya para sa susunod niyang pag-alis. Nang

tumigil na siya sa pagtatrabaho, ako naman ang abala

sa mga reports, periodical examinations at mga

research works. Nang nasa ospital na siya, kahit

makipagkuwentuhan ay mahirap nang gawin dahil halos

hindi na siya maintindihang magsalita dulot ng

chemotherapy.

Matagal nang patay ang Tatay. Minsan nabalitaan kong

dumating na ang seaman na tatay ng boss ko, pilit ko

siyang pinauuwi nang maaga. Minsan ding buong

kawilihan kong pinagmamasdan ang isang kaibigan ko na

nagmamadali dahil baka masaraduhan na siya ng grocery.

Kailangan niyang makabili ng

ingredients ng spaghetti dahil ‘yun daw ang bilin ng

tatay niyang na-stroke. Minsan rin nang makainuman ko

ang matalik kong kaibigan habang binubuhos niya sa

akin ang sama ng loob niya sa pagbabalik ng tatay niya

na malupit sa kanila nang mahabang panahon at

ipinagpalit sila sa ibang babae. Sa tingin ko lang,

“Buti ka pa nga may Tatay pa.” Syempre hindi ko sinabi

iyon sa kanya. Baka mamaya tanungin pa niya ako kung

kanino ako kampi, kami pa ang mag-away. Minsan din

sinamahan ko ang kababata ko nang dinalhan niya ng

pansit ang tatay niya sa City Jail. Hindi naman sila

nagtatanong kung bakit ako ganun. Wala naman silang

alam kay Tatay.

Maraming pagkakataon na nanghihinayang ako dahil

masyadong maaga ang paghihiwalay namin ng Tatay. Gusto

kong sisihin ang Pilipinas dahil napakahirap ng buhay

dito. Sa Amerika ba may tatay na nangingibang- bansa

para makapagtrabaho lang? Naisip ko tuloy na sumama na

lang sa mga nagpipiket na mga migrante dahil alam ko

tulad ko rin sila. Kadalasan rin sinisisi ko si Saddam

Hussein at ang Gulf War dahil kinuha nila ang tatlong

taon sa buhay ng Tatay. Sayang ang tatlong taong iyon.

Nakalaro ko man lang sana ang Tatay ng basketbol o di

kaya’y naturuan niya akong mag-bike. (Beinte anyos na

ko nang matuto mag-bike).

Isa sa mga klase ko sa writing ang nagpasulat sa amin

ng kahit ano tungkol sa aming mga tatay, samahan pa ng

larawan kung maaari. Bigla tuloy akong nalito. Hindi

ko alam kung anong tungkol sa Tatay ang isusulat ko.



Ikuwento ko kaya na isang Overseas Contract Worker si

Tatay. Isang bagong bayani. Nag-aambag ng malaki sa

ekonomiya ng Pilipinas. Sabihin ko kayang may larawan

ng tatay kong may suot na hard hat na dilaw,

construction boots at may hawak na drill at kasama

niyang nakangiti ang mga kapwa niyang

Pilipino with matching background na disyerto. O kaya

ang larawan nilang magkakababayan habang pinagdiriwang

nila ang New Year at nag-iiyakan dahil tinutugtog and

Lupang Hinirang. Ang drama no?

Kuwento ko kaya na isang survivor ng Gulf War ang

Tatay. Na natutulog siya at ipinaghehele ng mga

Patriot at Scud Missiles. Pakita ko kaya ang mga

remembrance ng Tatay na mga dull na landmines.

Adventure naman ang dating nito.

Kuwento ko kaya kung paano hindi nagpabaya ang Tatay

sa pagbibigay ng pangangailangan namin. Hindi kami

sumasala sa pagkain, may magagandang damit, maayos na

tirahan at nakakapag-aral. Siya ay naging isang good

provider. Siguro isang malalim na buntong hiningang

“Haaaaaay!” ang ibibigay sa akin ng mga kaklase ko.

O di kaya’y dalhin ko ang picture ni Tatay habang

kini-chemotherapy siya. Ikwento ko din kaya na naging

mabilis ang lahat ng mga pangyayari. Na inoperahan

siya sa loob ng walong oras at binutasan ang ulo niya.

Na nakalabas pa siya ng ospital. Pagkatapos ng isang

linggo, agad siyang namatay. Tragic naman ang approach

ko nito.

Gayahin ko kaya ang kuwento sa telebisyon na tipong

galit na galit sa mundo ang anak dahil hindi ito

nabigyan ng sapat na atensyon dahil inuna ng kanilang

tatay ang pinansyal nilang pangangailangan. Teka,

hindi naman totoo yon eh! Napaka-unfair naman ‘nun kay

Tatay.

Ikuwento ko na lang kaya ang isa sa mga magagandang

alaala namin kay Tatay. Apat na taon ako noon. Malinaw

na malinaw pa sa alaala ko ang pangyayari. Kadarating

lamang ng Tatay pagkaraan ng dalawang taon. Nagkaroon

ng simpleng party sa bahay. Kainuman niya ang mga

kumpare niya nang tumayo siya at binuhat ako mula sa

kuna ko habang pinaglalaruan ko ang bagong matchbox na

pasalubong niya sa akin. Inutusan niya ako na ikuha

siya ng beer sa refrigerator. Pagkakuha ko ng beer ay

kinandong niya ako at buong pagmamalaki na ibinida sa

mga kumpare niya na natanggap na raw ako sa local na

Day Care Center dahil abot na ng kanang kamay ko ang

aking kaliwang tenga kahit idaan pa sa ibabaw ng ulo

ko at matatas na ako magsalita at madali raw akong

matuto. Matagal din akong nanatili sa pagkakandong

niya. Mistula siyang bagong dating na hari na

suot-suot ang kanyang korona. Ako ang kanyang korona.

Kapag naaalala ko ito, napapawi ang lahat ng

panghihinayang ko sa mga taong kailangan niyang

magtrabaho at mawala sa piling namin. Mga panahong

kasama ng mga tatay nila ang mga anak nila. Ito na

lang ang isusulat ko. Bago ang lahat, pupunasahan ko

muna ang mga luha ko at ang patulo ko ng sipon. Baka

mapatakan pa ang keyboard ng computer at ang hawak

kong picture. Picture ng isang paslit na may hawak na

bote ng beer habang kandong ng tatay na kitang-kita

ang kasiyahan sa mukha.

Feedback:
Nang mapasali ako sa isang pagtitipon ng mga Pinoy dito sa Nagano, isang Catholic Bishop ang speaker din noon. Sa mensahe nya, ang family breakdown ang isang naging epekto ng programang OFW na di nasasagot ng OWWA at ibang ahensya ng pamahalaan. Eto ang isang punto ng Episcopal Commission for Migrant Workers ng CBPC.
Sa ibang simbahan, basta may donasyon lang ang mga migrante sa kanilang simbahan, ayos na. Sindihan na lang nila ng kandila, at bigyan ng magandang send- off ceremony pag namatay ang isang OFW. Aray ko!
Sana, tayong mga nasa ibang bansa, wag nating kalimutan ang mga bagay na mas importante sa pangangailangan ng ating pamilya at mga anak. Di nabibili ang kaligayahan. Di rin eto natutumbasan ng materyal. Nakayanan naman ni tatay o ni lolo natin na buhayin ang malaking pamilya natin sa di pagpunta sa ibang bansa.

O sige na nga…. kung kailangan ngang mag OFW, dalhin na lang ang mga anak at asawa para walang family breakdown. Hirap namang may asawa nga sa isang taon e minsan ka lang makakasiping ng asawa. May asawa ka nga, pero sa panahon at gabi ng pangangailangan, “gawaing binata” ka pa rin!?!? Ano ba yan! Natitiis mo ba sa isa o dalawang taon? Great saint!!!! o di kaya idaan mo na naman sa dasal sabay sabihing, “Sorry po Lord, tao lang po!”

Aray ko!

Intl Leadership Conference-La Union awards Peace Ambassadors

The recent ILC or Intl Leadership Conference in La Union, Philippines was graced by provincial and local government offficials. Acting Governor Clarence Martin de Guzman III and La Union First Lady and former Mayor of San Fernando City, Madame Mary Jane Ortega, were a few of those who attended the event and were recognized by UPF giving them the Peace Ambassador award. Hundreds of barangay chairmen and officials also attended the conference.Madame Myrna Ligas, the principal of Don Eulogio de Guzman Memorial Natioanl High School was a delegate to GPF Manila and attended the ILC last December. She initiated the ILC La Union calling Peace Ambassador Felix Sanchez to coordinate her with the UPF Philippines.

Dr. Julius Malicdem delivered the Peace Messages of Rev. Moon in his lectures during the whole day event.

Thanks to the efforts of Engr Felix Sanchez and Mr Froilan Matbagan and their staff in making all these events flow smoothly in just a short time of mobilization. Congratulations to the new Peace Ambassadors in La Union!

Family Rules

Being a father of five children (only), I realized the importance of family rules to manage if not control the uniqueness of each child. Perhaps, I need to recall how my father whipped me whenever I got overtime in my outdoor plays with my neighboring friends, gave me time outs, or have me grounded before. I remember the day when I joined my classmates before in going to the river and have our afternoon swimming without first going home from school. A passing neighbor reported us to my father. I got a fearful whip on my buttocks.

My eldest boy is now in his junior high school. He is doing fine though I can feel his needs to have more friends. Nevertheless, he enjoys his electronic games if not having his bike around.

But my second son is so fond of visiting his friends and going to parks where they can play. He seem to be more socialized among the five. But he lacks home priorities like helping at home or doing basic home chores on his level. There are times too that he came home quite late in the evening. And most of his reasons in he just stayed downstairs with his playmates.

I have no objection to their physical and social needs. I have passed those in my years.

But there are some priorities in them. Their homework, their learning and training to do basic house chores, their openness to cooperation, to teamwork,to self-realization on significance and importance in life are at stake.

My third boy is well objective and attentive to his homework. He now joins a baseball club together with his elder brother. Nevertheless, there are times too that he is emotionally disturbed. Perhaps, he needs to balance too his social affairs.

My two girls are both aggressive in and out. There seem to be no problem with them except on their self-control. But they are loving girls.

How about, if they are giving more their time in watching TV. Their mother is so strict on that. Yet the children are so fond of animation and cartoon programs. I need newswatch as well.

AS we only have one TV set, then here is one family rule: No Homework done, no TV-viewing!

This is fair so that they can prioritize first their school exercises before they learn too from TV. I consider TV as an educational instrument. That is AV.

During weekends, I want the kids to be cooperative too. So htey have house assignments like dish-washing, table cleaning, room cleaning and the like. I asked them too to make sure that they put-off all tissue paper from their pockets before they put all their dirty clothes to the laundry box. Their mom becomes so rough once tissue papers are in at the washing machine. It destroy all the washed clothes practically with those torn to pieces of tissue papers connecting to the washed wet clothes.

And how about if the rules are violated?

Learn lessons! Warning on first offense. If curfew is broken, parents become so disturb and concern of their kids outside. More on me as we are foreigners in this land. Sermons on second offense and a time out. A parent put his child on a cahir and dont allow him to go out for an hour. I have heard that a Korean father would give a time out to his kid by putting and locking him inside the toilet for at least 10 minutes. Japanese parents locked their children outside if ever they have made violations of family rules. For grown up teens, violators are grounded and have to stay home during their free time. They cannot go out for a week-long to learn lessons from their mistakes.

Well cultural differences are in it. But family rules are common. Parents wished to make their children grow up with proper discipline.

2009 International Leadership Conference in La Union

Bauang, La Union- La Union UPF of Northwestern Philippines is conducting today the International Leadership Conference at Don Eulogio de Guzman Natl High School in Bauang La Union. This conference is spearheaded by the Universal Peace Federation with its chapter coordinator in La Union Engr. Felix Sanchez, a Peace Ambassador awardee in Thailand few years ago. He is to give the opening remark in the conference too.
The conference is lead by the Provincial Acting Governor Eulogio Clarence Martin de Guzman III together with local government officials, the Dep Ed Officials in the region, high school Principals, educators, businessmen, community leaders, barangay chairmen, teachers, high school and college student leaders and representatives and parents at Don Eulogio Amang Rodriguez National High School in La Union. About 200 delegates are joining the ILC with the assistance of the previous ILC delegates particularly the high school principals in La Union. Architect Alfon Buyayo and his wife Dulce, the Northwest Cluster Regional Executive Director of UPF are also joining the affair.
Dr Julius Malicdem of UPF Philippines is going to be the main speaker to give the peace message with the theme, " New Leadership Paradigm for Good Governance".
Mr. Froilan L. Matbagan Jr, Engr Rosendo Anin and Mrs. Alma Degamo are frontliners in the ILC conference mobilization and preparation. (with reports from Heidi Matbagan, and Augie Sanchez)

Otanoshimikai in Day Care (Hoykuen) in Nagano Japan

Day Care and early childhood education in Japan poses a unique system and way of bringing up the young children to sports, cultural and academic affairs from age 2 to 5 years old.

From 7:30 am, the hoykuen is open to recieve the young children from parents who brought their children from Monday to Saturday. They are fetched back in the afternoon until 6:30 pm. or else, an overtime payment will be charged to the late parents.
Children brought their pajamas, unduku or sports wear, toiletry and a small or slim futon (sleeling bag) for their nap time. They have their lunch in the hoykuen, nap time, indoor and outdoor games, children's book-reading, paper-folding, drawing, singing, coloring, to the advancement of writing and reading the basic hiragana of the Japanese language. Their curricular program seem to be good and effective as it exposed the young children to the fundamental education starting from arts, culture, sports and academe.

Today, for the third year, I witnessed the cultural show or o-tanoshimikai in the hoykuen where my youngest daughter Julie is studying.

She was with their class doing the skit. She was given the first recital part of a story taken from selected children's books like the Peter Pan and the like. They also have other numbers on singing and palying some basic musical instruments like the tambourine, bells, chimes, bamboo-tik-taks, lyres and drum and others. Teachers were so good in developing the stage props from scenes one to the end.

Moreover, I observed the presence of a few special children who need more special care and attention. Amidst that case, teachers manage to bring them as part of the team in the stage plays and were given fitting roles to participate and act with the whole group.

Costumes were paper-made, props were from boxes but were all brightened to great compatible colors. Kudos to hoykuen teachers and staff!

I reflected that most mothers in the Philippines have difficulty to go to work because of the small children they take care. Japan has a good answer to that with the nice program in early childhood education. Toddlers from 1 to 2 year old are accpeted in the nursery where care-givers attend to them with the bottle milks and diapers. From 3 to 5 years old, the chidlrne are brought to their early educational program making the parents free to go to work for livelihood. They have their monthly payment for all the services from the hoykuen.

Filipina mothers are used to hire a yaya for their small children if they go to work. That needs monthly wage for the yaya. This time is cost P2,500 now aside from the food and shelter that they have with the family. But not all yayas are good to bring and expose the child to the field of art, sports, culture nad academe in the early years. Basically, the yaya became a mere "tagabantay" and nothing more.

Well, Day Care Programs in Philippines is under the DSWD yet the program is not a whole day but mostly from 2 to 4-hour program only in the Barangay halls usually. After that, mothers have to again take care of their children from lunchtime to the rest of the day.

From a Distance

From a distance, you can see in a broader view and general picture of a whole.

From a distance, not only a song, is a strategic way to view and to have the whole scope of a dream, your dream, like the vision of your organization or your family.

If you imagine your self on top of the mountain like the pictures above taken in Cavite and Davao, you can see down below the whole sorroundings and consider every angular view as part of the whole; every side as part of the dimensional picture of the whole.

Having a new year is just good to refresh ourselves on our dreams and take a look of the whole picture of it to make us closer to a realistic way of achieving our dreams.

Although I am far from my mission country the Philippines, I always take a look of what is going on in there in both external and internal ways. From where I am, I also study the good things that can be applied too to my country like the sports system in Japan, the hoykuen and youchein systems or early childhood education system of Japan and how it can be possible to do it successfully in the Philippines. These are two big examples from a distance. They have the nursery, todlers, kindergarten and day-care programs which are good enough for working mothers and fathers as they dont have domestic helpers here. In the Philippines domestic helpers have pros and cons. Which one is much better to apply? There are lots and more from this distance.

But looking the internal of the Philippines from a distance is much deeper as you dont have a direct or first hand information on why or how things happened to the recent trends and/or changes.

There are national, regional and local programs and projects in our NGO centers. One of it is the 210 local and regional GPF festivals for this year 2009. Local GPF's will be purely under the planning and financing of the local centers and members who dont have any resources but purely fundraising. And there are less than 50 centers in the Philippines right now. Hence, each center should have at least four to five GPF festivals per local center to conduct this year. Am I right from a distance? There are lots more in the inside.

Well, I asked since as I have said, it is too difficult to get direct information from the inside of my mission country. Communication is always a two-way communication and if one does not reply, stil, there is no communication even if one has raised or shouted his message/s or question/s from a distance.

From a distnace, there are people who wish to reach and be there in a specific place they saw. He may have admired and dreamt of being a part of that beautiful scene he has seen from a distance. But how can he be there?

To participate to local projects and activities in our local centers while being in a distance is not impossible. You can shout from a distance and perhaps your voice will be heard in that far place you want to be.

The internet, the cellphones, the radio broadcasting and the modern technology are good bridges for people from a distance to be closer.

We only pray and wish that people in our country will also have their internet, their phone loads, and their heart to also communicate and give essential importance to communication for people based from a distance.

New year, new communication system from a distance. May it be done according to His long awaited plan.